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When you Feel In Trouble

 My toddler thinks that "being in trouble" is an emotional state.  Occasionally she will angrily stomp up to me and tell me that she's "in trouble". This is because when she gets in trouble and is told she's in trouble it is because her emotional state has lead to misbehavior that gets her in trouble.  Defiance, shouting, hitting, the usual suspects of troublemaking.  She gets angry, upset, frustrated, sad, or any number of other emotions that do not lead to her getting into trouble.  But invariably when she tells me she's in trouble something a short while later will lead to her prophecy being fulfilled and her being sent to her room or having a privilege rescinded. Today it was she wanted me to go and watch her go down her "dark slide" where she's put the playroom floor mat over the slide and goes down the slide with it covering it. There's nothing innately wrong with this desire and I have no reason why I wouldn't want to play wi
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I Like Pizza

 Labor Day.  My spouse finally has a job that considers it a holiday in that he gets the day off vs the sort of job that considers it a holiday so you'd better work more. It's past noon.  We're big lazy bums have been playing the game of chicken where you see who can be hungrier longest in order to avoid making food for the family.  Naturally the kids have at least had breakfast and the toddler gets food on demand or when we notice her getting hangry because nobody wants to be around a hangry toddler. I wave the toddler over. "Hey, you wanna surprise Daddy with pizza?" "Oh yes, please. "It'll be a secret though, we want it to be a surprise.  Don't tell him we're getting pizza.  He'll be so surprised when it gets here." "Oh, okay!  Shhhh." I pull up various pizza options on my phone and computer with the toddler in my lap.  It's very difficult to browse deals and topping choices with her lack of awareness but we manage t
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What I Want for Breakfast

 Every morning I ask my 3-year-old what she wants for breakfast.  Eggs?  Oatmeal?  Yogurt?  Cereal?  Peanut butter and jelly?  If she won't make a choice I ask her what I want for breakfast.  She told me I wanted macaroni and cheese.  Yeah, I guess I can make that but I'm pretty confident that she doesn't want that for breakfast based on her tone of voice.  I gave her a few minutes and asked again. She requested white and black. WTF white and black.  You want a zebra for breakfast?  The local zoo would likely object. I ask her to show me because asking her to describe it just gets her to repeat the color scheme her ideal breakfast possesses. She leads me to the fridge. Inside the fridge she points at my container of plain yogurt and the plastic jar we put the homemade cherry jam her dad made into. White yogurt.  Black cherry jam.  She wants black cherry yogurt for breakfast. That I can do.  It's not half bad, neither.
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